Archive for September, 2005

Catch Elijah Wood’s new movie “Green Street Hooligans” at Loews Harvard Square

Friday, September 30th, 2005

Whatever movie you had planned on seeing this weekend, ditch that plan and head over to Loews Harvard Square to watch the latest Elijah Wood movie. Elijah Wood?!? Have I gone out of my mind?!? Not at all. You see, Elijah Wood’s latest flick is the almost unheard of and critically nonclaimed “Green Street Hooligans”, [...]

A Boston fan’s prayer

Friday, September 23rd, 2005

“I just want to see the Sox and the Patriots combine for three championships in thirteen months one more time in my life.” Some people are just pretty f—— hard to please.

Oh, that misbehaving royal family

Monday, September 19th, 2005

Commoners just don’t understand.

Panthers trample my prediction

Sunday, September 18th, 2005

Det var som satan. The Carolina Panthers beat the tar out of the New England Patriots up and down the field for four quarters. The Pats looked like crap, committing stupid penalties, dropping passes, over- and underthrowing open receivers. Ben Watson’s rookie-mistake fumble on New England’s final drive was a worthy finish to an absolutely [...]

Nobody escapes the Spanish imposition

Friday, September 16th, 2005

As expected, the City settled the voting rights case with the Federal diversity thugs. It’s the same old, same old: Naturalized citizens – who somehow passed the English-only citizenship test – don’t know enough English to actually vote, so the federal government forces the City “to provide more bilingual poll workers to speak Vietnamese, Chinese [...]

Well then, let’s change the Pledge of Allegiance

Friday, September 16th, 2005

The phrase “under God” was added to the Pledge of Allegiance in 1954, when America was fighting the Godless commie bastards (in the Soviet Union, not Cambridge, Mass.). That fight effectively ended in August 1991 when the drunk beat the incompetents in the streets of Moscow. Now, here in the States, a bunch of annoying [...]

Swedish Fish peddlers misspell Swedish town

Thursday, September 15th, 2005

The makers of the popular Swedish Fish is running an ad that asks Americans “How would you like it if we ate all of your cheeseburgers?” It’s a silly ad that’s written like a letter to the editor (writing and reading letters to the editor is a dadgum obsession for Swedes) and begs Americans to [...]

Patriots will soundly defeat the Carolina Panthers

Thursday, September 15th, 2005

The Carolina Panthers are not a bad team, even though they failed to defeat the New Orleans Saints, a team that has lost not only its facilities but its entire hometown, but they aren’t likely to beat the New England Patriots. No team has figured out how to beat the Patriots defense, with its suffocating [...]

Governors and mayors can’t just get along

Wednesday, September 7th, 2005

Massachusetts’ Governor Mitt Romney v. Boston’s Mayor Tom Menino over where to plant a memorial tree for the victims of the Muslim suicide attacks in London. Louisiana’s Governor Kathleen Blanco v. New Orleans’ Mayor Ray Nagin over how to evacuate New Orleans. This is how it should be. We don’t vote for mayor just to [...]

New in Sampan

Wednesday, September 7th, 2005

My favorite local ethnic rag, the bilingual Chinese/Chinese-American Sampan has a new issue out. I recommend the “What’s up” interview with a bunch of teenagers, and a piece written by an Asian-American of mixed heritage who recently visited China for the first time. Check this sample from the latter: I went out with the doorman [...]